I don’t usually read self-help books. I always end up not liking the idea that someone is directly telling me what to do in my life. However, there’s been a lot of buzz about this book and with a short enough length (224 pages/5 hour audiobooks) and a title like that, I had to give it a try.
There is nothing subtle about Manson. He truly did not give a fuck in regards to crudeness despite censoring the title. He’s here to lead our way past all the conventional self-help nonsense, helping us find something meaningful in life and teach us not to give a fuck about things that aren’t worth wasting your fucks on. Now, while I admit The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck is a catchy title (hey, it worked on me), the story isn’t just about not giving a fuck about anything, but more importantly giving fucks about the right things. An important point emphasised throughout the book is that we are all going to die, and we have a limited number of fucks to give. So why waste them on things that don’t truly matter in the end. Okay, I’ll try not saying the word ‘fuck’ for the rest of this post.
I don’t intend to slap all his ideas here and I would recommend you go out and read the book yourself. It’s a pretty quick read, and the author’s honest remarks, sarcastic humour, interesting stories and through-provoking ideas make it a breeze. However, I would like to point out some of the points that stuck out to me.
Don’t ask what you want life to be. Instead, ask “What kind of pain do I want?” Conventional self-help advice which tells you to visualize success and think about the type of person you want to be. This way. who you are becomes defined by what you think success is. Manson introduces a new concept. He claims that everyone wants the same things in life: a good job, lots of money, a happy marriage, and all that crap. But who you are is truly defined by what you are willing to struggle for. That is a larger determinant of what your life might turn out to be. Finding something important and meaningful in your life is perhaps the most productive use of your time and energy. It’s okay for things to suck some of the time. Some suffering is inevitable.
It may not be your fault, but it’s your responsibility. Accepting responsibility for our problems is the first step to solving them. Some idiot may be driving on the wrong side of the road and crash into you, or someone may drop coffee on your laptop. It’s not your fault. But it is your responsibility. You can be angry and curse them every day for the next week. Or you can take responsibility and get your car or your laptop fixed. I
Actions aren’t the result of motivation, but the cause of it. Do something. No matter how small, do something. Don’t just sit there waiting for your motivation or “the right moment”. Take a small step towards a goal and inspiration will follow. This is something I’ve personally experienced. Whenever I think about a code project that I want to work on, thinking about the result is overwhelming and I usually don’t know where to start. But instead of wasting too much time planning, I’d just go for it and open a blank file and start writing some code, any code. And as I get smaller things to work, I get engaged and want to keep working on it. This also reminds me of a vlog by Burnie Burns where he talks about how motivation is fickle and unreliable as a source of taking action. You must instead develop the discipline to work on something every day, even if you don’t want to and motivation will follow.
Trust me, Mark explains these, and more, in a much better way. This book was definitely worth giving a fuck about. I know I said I won’t say fuck again, but I don’t give a fuck (subtly).
Ha!
Kavi Reads 
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